Day 1: Seeing Shanghai

With this adoption trip, we talked our adoption agency into letting us opt out of their traditional trip itinerary (which typically starts in Beijing) in order to cut costs.  So we flew directly to Shanghai and shaved two days off the beginning of our trip, which is saving us quite a bit of money.  While I've been sad to miss out on the adoption travel group experience (it is so great to have other families going through the same process together) it's also nice to have more of a say in what we do and see.  When I was living in China as an English teacher, the first place I visited was Shanghai, and honestly, it was probably my least favorite place I visited.  But I attribute that to the fact that I was taken straight from the airport, completely dizzy with jet lag, to museums and other touristy areas.  Although I do enjoy a good museum, and can appreciate some good touristy areas, there is something to be said for just diving in to some good old people watching.  This time I wanted to see Shanghai, Hallie's birth city, in a different way... an "everyday" kind of way to better see and understand where Hallie is actually coming from.  When I heard about these motorbike/sidecar tours that take you off the beaten path, to the places where people are going about their daily life, I knew it was how I wanted to see Shanghai and I set to work convincing Ryan that's what we needed to do.  Luckily he was persuaded.

We arrived at our pickup place early, so we spent some time roaming the area.

Impressively big bags of produce strapped to a scooter.

I love the streets lined with Sycamore trees.  And apparently Kaitlyn does too.

Some group dancing going on in front of Dunkin Donuts.

Can you spot the little boy in green?

Shanghai is known for being such a modern city but it's still China, where anything goes.  I love all of the contrast of the old and the new.

And the tour begins...

Just a few safety hazards.

This place was incredible.  Apparently it's a mix of speed dating and arranged marriages.  Parents come together and put up profiles for their child while others walk around browsing the profiles in an attempt to try to select a spouse for their child.  Each of these umbrellas have profiles on them. 

And all of these are profiles...

And here are some people discussing the possibilities.

We walked through winding paths packed with parents and lined with marriage profiles.

I was kind of surprised at how few of them had pictures attached...

But we did find a few nice ones...

We also stopped at a temple that is less touristy than most.

Luka, our guide, was great.

Feeding the Koi.

The neighborhood just outside the temple peeking in.

Next we visited this building that was once a slaughter house.  It's amazing that so much architectural work was put into a building for slaughtering/processing/packaging meat.  It is surprisingly beautiful and is now a trendy place to take wedding photos.

We visited an "old town" market, where we didn't see any other foreigners.  

You could buy anything there... including some pretty sweet teeth.

From the market, we wandered into these narrow streets/alleyway/housing area.

This is what Enoch looks like after having been petted by an adorable Chinese Granny.  She was fascinated by Enoch and Kaitlyn's blond hair.

Saying goodbye to their new friend.

Out in the alley is where these families do all of their washing and preparing of food.

Back in the market...

This turtle is advertising for a product, made from turtles, that can heal any of the ailments pictured below.

Unfortunately it started to rain.  At first we just threw on some rain gear, and the rain just seemed to add to the adventure, but when it really started pouring, we had to cut the tour a little short and head back to our hotel.

Of course it stopped raining when by the time we got back to our hotel.  This was such a fun way to see a different side of Shanghai.  We completely loved it!

 

Enoch showing off his guns because Kaitlyn was showing off her scooter shirt.

These funny beans are just across the street from our hotel.

Enoch and Kaitlyn playing nicely while we meet out agency guide and discuss plans for our "Gotcha Day" with Hallie.  I am so glad we were able to bring Kaitlyn along, she's really helped Enoch relax and enjoy himself.  And I'm sure that will help Hallie's adjustment too.

We made a quick trip to the hotel swimming pool before bed.  Enoch is looking super sporty in his required swim cap.

Here's the cool view from our hotel room.

Only one more day until we meet Hallie!

Destination: Shanghai

With too much to get ready, and not enough time, I did not get much sleep going into this trip.  Three nights before we left, I went to bed at 2am, two nights before I went to bed at 4am and the night before we left, Ryan and I pulled an all-nighter.  But we made it!  So much of the preparation was actually for leaving Mason and Jordan behind.  And a lot of my last minute packing time was taken up with an unexpected trip to the doctor where Jordan finally received an official asthma diagnosis, and multiple trips to the pharmacy to acquire all of the new supplies we'd need for him.  We knew it was coming, but it was pretty terrible timing.  In the end, when we dropped the kids off at Ryan's parents house, we had enough medical supplies and typed up instructions to fill a sizable duffel bag.  I think we might have slightly overwhelmed Ryan's parents.  What usually doesn't seem like a lot, feels like a huge load when you actually sit down and try to explain it all and I started to feel anxious about leaving them behind.  So... any prayers that all of our kids stay healthy for the next 2 weeks would be greatly appreciated!  I already miss Maddie, Mason and Jordan like crazy!!

After staying up all night, you would think we would have made it to the airport with plenty of time, but somehow we still left a half hour after we wanted to.  Then, Ryan, in his exhausted state, missed the exit to the airport, adding time, and we had issues at our check in, including a boarding pass that didn't show up.  We ended up cutting it much closer than I ever like to, but thankfully we were pulled into the expedited security line, which helped us made it to our gate with enough time to take a breath and take the kids to the bathroom one last time

 Enoch is our only child who has not been in an airplane.  (middle child problem)  He's been kind of nervous about it.  A few weeks ago we were talking about how long we'd be in the air and he told me he didn't think he could make it that long without a bathroom.  Poor kid!  He felt a little bit better after he found out there were bathrooms on the airplane.  But I still think all of the unknowns have had him worried.

Enoch and Kaitlyn proudly wearing their TSA Security badges.

 Next stop: L.A.

If only the flight to China could be this quick and easy!

We had a 3 1/2 hour layover in LA where there was a lot of swinging in between this...

...and this.

 And then finally... we boarded a plane for China!!

 This flight never gets any shorter.   The kids spent waaay too long staring at screens in a zombie like state, and then finally crashed.

 Touchdown.  Here we are in the "Foreigner's" line at customs in Shanghai.  Kaitlyn was not feeling so good.

Finding a taxi driver willing to cram all of us and all of our stuff into their cab was much easier this time.  It helped that Ryan made friends with a an American man on the flight who was on his way to China to visit his Chinese wife... it was a kind of a long complicated story, but his wife met us at the airport and took us straight to a cab, told the driver where to take us, and we were off.  No hassles like last year!

Does the fact that this picture cracks me up make me a bad mom?  It just captures how we all felt so well.  Shanghai rush hour traffic meant it took an over an hour to get to our hotel from the airport.  It felt like at least 3 hours.  In all of my planning for the trip, I didn't think about the fact that Enoch gets car sick very easily and even people who don't get car sick easily would have a hard time with they way they drive in China.  Good thing we grabbed a few airplane vomit bags.  They might come in handy a time or two.

We were all asleep not too long after settling in to our hotel room.  And thanks to jet lag, we were all awake around 4am.  I gave everyone some Melatonin and they all fell back asleep, even I was able to drift back off!  But it didn't last long for me because Kaitlyn keep talking in her sleep about "Chubby Baby" saying things like, "Come here Chubby Baby", "You're so chubby, Chubby Baby", and "Chubby!"  So thanks to "Chubby Baby" I was up early enough to get a little blogging in before we start our day.  There are just 2 days until we meet Hallie!

Two More Days!

We leave to China in two days.  TWO.  I'm kind of freaking out.  I still have so much to do to get ready and I really should be sleeping, but my mind is having a hard time shutting down for the night.  People keep asking me if I'm excited to finally be going to get Hallie.  And I am.  I really am.  But I'm also nervous.  I gave that honest response to someone who asked me just yesterday and she questioned, "What are you nervous about?  You've done this before!"  This is true.  I have.  And it stretched me.  There is a part of me is not ready to be stretched again so soon.  The dust is still seemingly settling from bringing Jordan home.  We're just making great breakthroughs with his eating and his language has taken off, making communication so much easier.  Our medical appointments have slowed down and life is finding its way to our new normal.  The thing is, Jordan's transition, by adoption standards, went amazingly well.  I've been trying to mentally prepare myself for a more typical transition.

Hallie is 4 years old.  She is old enough to be truly terrified of Ryan and me and the fact that we are taking her away from everything she has ever known.  I can't imagine how scary it is going to be for her... how hard it is going to be to trust these strange, new adults, especially when many of the adults in her life have let her down.  She is coming from a hard place.  I haven't blogged as much about Hallie as I did with Jordan and part of that is because of an overall lack of time, but also, the bits of information we've received about Hallie are heartbreaking.  We know that she has been treated less than kindly and that has made me feel a little more protective of her and her story.  None of that makes me want her less, in fact it makes me want her more.  I just wish we could have had her home sooner.  Four years is a long time to live without a family.  To live in fear.  To live without feeling loved.  We already have a whole slew of doctors appointments set up for when we get home.  But I'm more worried about how we'll heal her emotional wounds.  I just hope and pray that she'll learn to trust us, to let us love her, and be her family. 

With that, here are our final updated pictures of Hallie:

And this is my favorite video of our cute girl threading beads like a pro.  There is such a sweetness about her and an eagerness to please.  My favorite part is near the end at about 2:30 the nanny asks her a question, that I assume is something like, "Who is this picture for?" and she quietly answers "Mama... Mama Hao"  (Mama... Mama is good).  I know, I know, it was just something her nannies prompted her to say, but her little shifty eye way of saying it makes me love her even more.  In spite of my nerves, I adore this little girl and I really can't wait to meet our Hallie!

Getting Ready To Go Get Hallie

We got Travel Approval two weeks too late to be able to go get Hallie and be back before school starts, which was a bit of a bummer.  Ryan can't miss the first two weeks of school without paying for it majorly, so that means we are waiting until August 27th to leave to China.  Although I'd love to be there right now, meeting Hallie, it's actually been a good thing that we are waiting.  First of all, I'm sick.  Nothing too bad, but a sore throat and an overall tired, yucky feeling... definitely not how I want to feel on an adoption trip.  Also, Typhoon Soudelor, the strongest storm of 2015, is making its way to China and though Shanghai doesn't fall directly in it's path, accuweather.com says (read this in your best announcer voice) "The outermost rain bands of Soudelor will also graze Shanghai during the second half of this weekend. While widespread issues are not expected, localized flash flooding cannot be ruled out."  We could do without a typhoon, and are glad to not be worrying about it.  There's also the fact that it turns out our airfare is looking to be much more reasonable than it was for Jordan's adoption.  Part of that is because we're not purchasing tickets so last minute, but also, we're just missing peak travel season, which really helps.  After receiving more grant rejection letters from some of the organizations that had helped out with Jordan's adoption, we are glad to cut costs any way we can.

Once again, we've found ourselves in the situation of knowing that we have a child on the other side of the planet, who we need to bring home quickly, with the realization that, even after using every penny of our savings, we will still come short.  The only way we could be okay with that is because of God's reassurance that it will all work out in the end.  So for months we've been looking for ways to come up with the money and praying... lots of praying, together as a family, that we could bring together the money when we needed it.  As we've come closer to travel, several people have made contributions to help get Hallie home.  It's hard to express our immense appreciation for the generosity of friends, family, and even a few strangers that have been trying to help us make up the last of the funds we need.  The ironic thing is, every single time someone donates, our first reaction is, "Ack, we can't take that!"  But I finally had an "ah-ha" moment where I realized that every bit, no matter how big or small, is an answer to our prayers and how ridiculous it would be to pray for something and then reject it, so we are just trying to work on graciously accepting help.

Speaking of help, after taking Maddie and Kaitlyn to China with us to adopt Jordan, it was clear that having them there was a huge asset and there was no doubt that they eased Jordan's transition.  So we knew that when we went to meet Hallie, we would definitely take a child with us again.  The obvious choice was to take Enoch, since he was next in line, and we've been planning on that all along.  But a few months ago, I started feeling like we should take one of our girls too, that Hallie would really benefit from having a sister there as well.  I kept hoping some grant money could make it possible, but when it came time to get our visas, we knew we weren't going to be able to afford taking an extra girl.  Yet, after talking it over, Ryan and I felt like we should go ahead and get Kaitlyn a visa too, just in case.  (We had just taken Maddie with us to Chicago, so we thought that if we could somehow pull it off, it would be most fair to take Kate)  By the time we got our visas back, I was pretty sure we had just wasted our money on getting Kaitlyn's visa and was a little sick about the waste.  Our Travel Approval came and we started working on booking airfare.  We asked our agent to price tickets for Kaitlyn too, though we doubted we'd take her.  We finally had our flights on hold, and just had to wait until the next morning to get our agency's approval before making our final decision about taking Kate and purchasing our tickets.  That evening our neighbors, the Gibbons, showed up with a check for the amount we needed to take Kaitlyn too, saying they really wanted her to be able to go with us.  We were blown away by their generosity and their amazing timing, literally hours before we had to make our final decision.  I still tear up when I think about it.  As hard and stressful as this whole adoption business can be, it gives a chance to see the goodness of so many people.  We're excited and nervous and ready to go get Hallie... when we finish the million and one things we need to do before we leave!