Saturday, March 29, 2014
LID
We reached another adoption lingo milestone- Log In Date. Once our dossier was sent to China, it had to be "logged in" to the CCCWA's (China's) system. It could have taken up to 3 weeks... but only took 4 days from DTC. This is good. We hope things continue to move quickly!
And since this is a short post, I decided to include a picture of Jordan... because I can. Remember how I have 232 pictures of the first year of his life? Look how tiny our sweet guy was. That binky is practically the size of his face. There is something about his eyes in this picture make me wish I was there to hold him.
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
A New Phase Of Life
Our life as of October 7, 2013:
Ryan and I often discussed how excited we were about the phase of life we were soon entering.
With Maddie and Kaitlyn already in school, Enoch starting Kindergarten, and Mason in preschool, I was looking forward to 5 hours a week with NO children at home... 5 HOURS! It might not sound like a lot, but having gone about a decade with at least one small child in tow, while I shop, clean, exercise, even while I shower, I was ready to squeeze a lot of things into those 5 hours a week.
And the diapers. We've spent a small mint on diapers over the years, and are working on potty training Mason, not very successfully, but still... working on it. We could see how close we were to being out of the diaper stage for good. I still get a silly smile thinking about the day we are diaper free.
All of our kids are becoming more portable. They can all dress themselves, feed themselves, and do their own buckles in the car. We can all go to the movies together and actually sit through the movie. We are able to do more things all together without someone having to sit out to take care of a baby. We kind of like it.
Also, Mason's health has improved so much that we hardly ever worry. We don't go to near the number of doctor's appointments that we used to, we've weaned him off of all of his medications, except Growth Hormone and he actually eats now. Mason's eating has been some kind of wonderful. Sometimes I almost forget how hard things had been. We were chronically stressed the first couple years of his life, much more stressed than we ever let on.
We've always tried to build up our savings, but some bit of life always seems to prevent us from making much progress. Since draining our savings to purchase our home in 2011, we were finally starting to boost our savings back up. It has felt so very good to see our savings account consistently growing and knowing that we were becoming a little bit more financially secure.
Apart from our "untouchable" savings, we were also saving to build a deck in backyard. It was something that we planned to do the summer after we moved in, but Mason's medical needs drained our deck fund time and time again. We were sure that this spring we would finally have the extra money set aside to build that deck. No more walking out the back door into dirt and weeds. It would have been beautiful. Additional, we were working towards a truck for Ryan. Something he's wanted since I've known him. Something that he's had to put off getting over and over. Something that I was looking forward to finally give him the okay to go out and get.
Our Life as of October 8, 2013:
We saw Jordan's face.
Knowing that "me time" will have to wait, diapers will keep being dirtied, getting out will be harder, we'll once again frequent Primary Children's Hospital, most likely struggle to feed a child, drain our savings another time, and indefinitely put off all unnecessary purchases... we knew Jordan was our child.
And... knowing all of that, we are still excited for this new phase of life. It's not the same naive excitement we had expecting our first baby. We know a lot of what we're in for. We've experienced enough life to know that even if you think you know what you're in for, you're usually only partially right. Life won't be as easy, or comfortable as it had been becoming, but we will experience growth in ways I'm sure we haven't even thought of. We know this adoption experience will benefit our family in ways that living comfortably never could. It's not the new phase of life we were expecting, but we're happy all the same.
Ryan and I often discussed how excited we were about the phase of life we were soon entering.
With Maddie and Kaitlyn already in school, Enoch starting Kindergarten, and Mason in preschool, I was looking forward to 5 hours a week with NO children at home... 5 HOURS! It might not sound like a lot, but having gone about a decade with at least one small child in tow, while I shop, clean, exercise, even while I shower, I was ready to squeeze a lot of things into those 5 hours a week.
And the diapers. We've spent a small mint on diapers over the years, and are working on potty training Mason, not very successfully, but still... working on it. We could see how close we were to being out of the diaper stage for good. I still get a silly smile thinking about the day we are diaper free.
All of our kids are becoming more portable. They can all dress themselves, feed themselves, and do their own buckles in the car. We can all go to the movies together and actually sit through the movie. We are able to do more things all together without someone having to sit out to take care of a baby. We kind of like it.
Also, Mason's health has improved so much that we hardly ever worry. We don't go to near the number of doctor's appointments that we used to, we've weaned him off of all of his medications, except Growth Hormone and he actually eats now. Mason's eating has been some kind of wonderful. Sometimes I almost forget how hard things had been. We were chronically stressed the first couple years of his life, much more stressed than we ever let on.
We've always tried to build up our savings, but some bit of life always seems to prevent us from making much progress. Since draining our savings to purchase our home in 2011, we were finally starting to boost our savings back up. It has felt so very good to see our savings account consistently growing and knowing that we were becoming a little bit more financially secure.
Apart from our "untouchable" savings, we were also saving to build a deck in backyard. It was something that we planned to do the summer after we moved in, but Mason's medical needs drained our deck fund time and time again. We were sure that this spring we would finally have the extra money set aside to build that deck. No more walking out the back door into dirt and weeds. It would have been beautiful. Additional, we were working towards a truck for Ryan. Something he's wanted since I've known him. Something that he's had to put off getting over and over. Something that I was looking forward to finally give him the okay to go out and get.
Our Life as of October 8, 2013:
We saw Jordan's face.
Knowing that "me time" will have to wait, diapers will keep being dirtied, getting out will be harder, we'll once again frequent Primary Children's Hospital, most likely struggle to feed a child, drain our savings another time, and indefinitely put off all unnecessary purchases... we knew Jordan was our child.
And... knowing all of that, we are still excited for this new phase of life. It's not the same naive excitement we had expecting our first baby. We know a lot of what we're in for. We've experienced enough life to know that even if you think you know what you're in for, you're usually only partially right. Life won't be as easy, or comfortable as it had been becoming, but we will experience growth in ways I'm sure we haven't even thought of. We know this adoption experience will benefit our family in ways that living comfortably never could. It's not the new phase of life we were expecting, but we're happy all the same.
Love this pic. He is just swimming in that onesie!
Monday, March 24, 2014
Dossier To China
Last Monday, our adoption agency sent us an email saying they had received our package of documents... yea! When I asked, they said that it would 9-11 business days for them to complete the critical review of our dossier and another week for our dossier to be bound, translated and mailed to China. With that in mind, we thought the soonest we would be DTC would be April 3rd. The next day we were surprised to receive another email saying:
"We were able to complete the critical review of your dossier today
(much quicker than we are typically able to do!) Your dossier is
complete and everything looks fantastic! Job well done! Your dossier has now been moved to translation and will be mailed to
China within a few days."
I had heard that our agency only sends dossiers to China on Fridays, I'm not sure if that's true or not, but I was sure we'd be DTC on Friday and compulsively checked my email all day. I had started to give up hope of such a fast DTC, but checked my email one last time before heading out to a BBQ and did a little happy dance when I got this message:
"Here’s the news you’ve long been waiting for—your dossier was sent to China today (3/21/2014)!"
With this step alone, we cut 2 weeks off of our wait. At this point, every day matters... a lot. Our best guess for travel has been sometime in August. But because Ryan is a teacher, travel the 2 middle weeks of August is out of the question, we really would have to travel in July to make it back in time, or we'll have to wait until late August/early September. I hate to think that we would possibly have to wait an extra month to bring Jordan home, so we are really hoping for another miracle, a super short LOA (letter of acceptance) wait that could mean July travel. Any prayers would be welcome!
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
The Red Thread (or yarn in our case)
Dear Amy,
Luo is a darling little guy :) He's so young and his medial need is considered mild, so the chances of him getting assigned as SPECIAL FOCUS are pretty slim. He'll likely go to the shared list and at that point be locked by an agency that has a family with a dossier already logged into China.
The rules state that he would have to be on the shared list for a full 2 months before his status would change to Special Focus. Your best bet is to get your dossier done as quickly as you can and pray for a lucky break (or a red thread) to this little guy. It is a long shot, but I want to be honest with you and not get your hopes up too high.
Miracles happen I see 'em all the time, but it'd be a miracle.
Kindly,
"Julia" (name changed)
I looked up what a red thread was, and learned that there is an ancient Chinese proverb that states that "An invisible red thread connects those destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstances. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break."
Since I'm a knitter, I like to think that it's actually red yarn that connects Jordan to us, but red thread, red yarn, or not, I know for a fact that Jordan is meant to be in our family.
Yesterday I received this message from a woman named "Heidi":
Hello – I know you don’t know me and I hope this message is not too inappropriate, but when I saw you post the picture of your little one yesterday, I was so so very happy. You see, he was our first referral and after a week of intense research, prayer and soul searching, for various reasons (some of which were personal), we ultimately declined to adopt him. I think it was the hardest thing I have ever done, and my only comfort was the he would find a home somewhere… I know you are probably an answer to prayer for a lot of people who care about him, but wanted to make sure you knew that you are an answer to my prayer specifically. Thank you so much for loving him and making a place for him in your family!
In writing back and forth with "Heidi" I learned that she was the one who contacted the MAGIC Foundation to find out about Russell-Silver Syndrome, which, in turn, lead to Jennifer sharing his information with me. If it weren't for "Heidi" we never would have know about Jordan or pursued adoption. This is just one of the many instances were things were laid into place to bring Jordan into our family.
I believe that God is the tier of "red thread" and has a plan for each of us. I don't understand why Jordan had to be born on the other side of world and experience the pain and loss that no one his age should have to know, but I know that God loves him and ultimately wanted him to be a part of our family.
Our arms are aching from winding and winding that red yarn to pull Jordan closer to home, but it's a good ache, because we know that eventually we will get to hold him in our tired arms and bring Jordan home.
Monday, March 17, 2014
Lucky Charm...er & Happy St. Patricks Day!
There is something so charming about this boy. And I'm not saying that
to try to make a pun. You know, because his jammies say "lucky charm"
on them.... There is just something special about him, and I don't
think it's just the fact that I'm his mom. His pictures captivate.
Speaking of pictures, over the weekend someone contacted me and gave me a
link and a password to a photo storing site. It has 232... that's two
HUNDRED thirty two beautiful pictures of Jordan! We are crazy lucky. They are all from his
first year of life at his former foster care organization. I'm pretty
sure that means he has more baby pictures than Mason, our youngest, has. I'm so glad
he'll have these pictures.
Also, we were notified that our dossier documents all made it safely to
our agency and are now in "critical review". Whew! As long as
everything looks good, our dossier should be off to China by April 1st!
Saturday, March 15, 2014
5 Months Work
Today was a big day... it was huge. I went to the post office and dropped off a package that consisted of a stack of papers, about an inch thick, some photos, and two checks. When I handed it to the postal worker, I asked him to take care of my baby. Silly, I know, but I was feeling a bit protective. Then I tried to keep myself composed as I walked out of the post office. I didn't expect to feel emotional simply dropping off a package, but these papers are the product of the culmination of 5 long months of hard work. Sending them to our adoption agency was our final step in compiling our dossier. It feels so amazingly good to be making significant progress!
Here is a look at the ridiculous amount of paperwork involved in an international adoption:
The two columns of papers on the right, (with all of the pretty little signatures and seals that cost a pretty penny) and the stack of papers in the front of the left column, were what I sent off today. The other three stacks are papers I keep keep filed away in folders. I wish I had a picture of all of the grant application paperwork I've done too. A There wouldn't be room enough on our bed for all of it.
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Jordan Meeting The Family
We received these pictures today... Jordan, looking through the photo book that we sent him for Christmas. He is getting to know our faces! Happiness is an understatement. It makes the connection feel so much more real. He is holding something that we held, and is reaching out and touching the pictorial versions of us. Seeing this somehow bridges the distance between us. He still isn't home with us, but he's closer.
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