Wednesday, March 26, 2014

A New Phase Of Life

Our life as of October 7, 2013:

Ryan and I often discussed how excited we were about the phase of life we were soon entering.

With Maddie and Kaitlyn already in school, Enoch starting Kindergarten, and Mason in preschool, I was looking forward to 5 hours a week with NO children at home... 5 HOURS!  It might not sound like a lot, but having gone about a decade with at least one small child in tow, while I shop, clean, exercise, even while I shower, I was ready to squeeze a lot of things into those 5 hours a week. 

And the diapers.  We've spent a small mint on diapers over the years, and are working on potty training Mason, not very successfully, but still... working on it.  We could see how close we were to being out of the diaper stage for good.  I still get a silly smile thinking about the day we are diaper free. 
All of our kids are becoming more portable.  They can all dress themselves, feed themselves, and do their own buckles in the car.  We can all go to the movies together and actually sit through the movie.  We are able to do more things all together without someone having to sit out to take care of a baby.  We kind of like it.

Also, Mason's health has improved so much that we hardly ever worry.  We don't go to near the number of doctor's appointments that we used to, we've weaned him off of all of his medications, except Growth Hormone and he actually eats now.  Mason's eating has been some kind of wonderful.  Sometimes I almost forget how hard things had been.  We were chronically stressed the first couple years of his life, much more stressed than we ever let on.

We've always tried to build up our savings, but some bit of life always seems to prevent us from making much progress.  Since draining our savings to purchase our home in 2011, we were finally starting to boost our savings back up.  It has felt so very good to see our savings account consistently growing and knowing that we were becoming a little bit more financially secure.

Apart from our "untouchable" savings, we were also saving to build a deck in backyard.  It was something that we planned to do the summer after we moved in, but Mason's medical needs drained our deck fund time and time again. We were sure that this spring we would finally have the extra money set aside to build that deck.  No more walking out the back door into dirt and weeds.  It would have been beautiful. Additional, we were working towards a truck for Ryan.  Something he's wanted since I've known him.  Something that he's had to put off getting over and over.  Something that I was looking forward to finally give him the okay to go out and get.  

Our Life as of October 8, 2013:

We saw Jordan's face.

Knowing that "me time" will have to wait, diapers will keep being dirtied, getting out will be harder, we'll once again frequent Primary Children's Hospital, most likely struggle to feed a child, drain our savings another time, and indefinitely put off all unnecessary purchases... we knew Jordan was our child.

And... knowing all of that, we are still excited for this new phase of life.  It's not the same naive excitement we had expecting our first baby.  We know a lot of what we're in for.  We've experienced enough life to know that even if you think you know what you're in for, you're usually only partially right.  Life won't be as easy, or comfortable as it had been becoming, but we will experience growth in ways I'm sure we haven't even thought of.  We know this adoption experience will benefit our family in ways that living comfortably never could.  It's not the new phase of life we were expecting, but we're happy all the same.
Love this pic.  He is just swimming in that onesie!

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